Before I tell my joke, please be advised that I am a Native American from the White Earth Reservation So with that said; One day my daughter called me (at the time she was only 7). She says; "Dad? I have a joke for you. You want to hear it?" I said; "Sure! Let 'er rip" She says; "Why don't we (indians) drink a lot of tea before we go to bed?" I responded; "Hmm...Gee honey, I have no idea?

"So we won't drown in our own TEE-PEE".

LMAO! Now keep in mind that this was coming from a 7 yr old! Damn that was funny. Well to me anyways.

Psychotic_God

Before I tell my joke, please be advised that I am a Native American from the White Earth Reservation So with that said; One day my daughter called me (at the time she was only 7). She says; "Dad? I have a joke for you. You want to hear it?" I said; "Sure! Let 'er rip" She says; "Why don't we (indians) drink a lot of tea before we go to bed?" I responded; "Hmm...Gee honey, I have no idea?

"So we won't drown in our own TEE-PEE".

LMAO! Now keep in mind that this was coming from a 7 yr old! Damn that was funny. Well to me anyways.

Kids say the darndest things. 

this one is tricky to get to work right...but i love it.

person a: What is yellow, green, and has 1000 legs?
person b: I dont know. what?
A: Time magazine.
B: I dont get it.
A:I dont get it either, I get Newsweek.

Two sausages are sitting sizzlling away in a frying pan .. one sausage turns to the other and remarks "gee its getting rather hot in here"
The other sausage stunded for a second  screams  OH MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!!

Submitted By: Michelle Palm Desert, Ca  (You didn't think I made all these up myself, did you?)

Two guys are trying to get in a quick eighteen holes, but there are two terrible lady golfers in front of them hitting the ball everywhere but where it's supposed to go.
The first guy says, "Why don't you go over and ask if we can play through?" The second guy gets about halfway there, turns and comes back. The first guy says, "What's wrong?"
He says, "One of them is my wife, and the other is my mistress."
The first guy says, "That could be a problem. I'll go over." He gets about halfway there and he turns and comes back, too.
The second guy says, "What's wrong?"
The first guy says, "Small world!"

Two computer science students met on campus one day. The first student called out to the other, "Hey, nice bike! Where did you get it?"
"Well," replied the other, "I was walking to class the other day when this pretty, young co-ed rode up on this bike. She jumped off, took off all of her clothes, and said, 'You can have ANYTHING you want!' "
"Good choice," said the first. "Her clothes wouldn't have fit you anyway."


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In a Tokyo Hotel:
Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing, please not to read notice.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby:
The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Leipzig elevator:
Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
In a Belgrade hotel elevator:
To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
In a Paris hotel elevator:
Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a hotel in Athens:
Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.
In a Yugoslavian hotel:
The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In a Japanese hotel:
You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:
You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers:
Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
On the menu of a Polish hotel:
Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.
Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop:
Ladies may have a fit upstairs.
In a Bangkok dry cleaner's:
Drop your trousers here for best results.
Outside a Paris dress shop:
Dresses for street walking.
In a Rhodes tailor shop:
Order your summer’s suit. Because of big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
From the Soviet Weekly:
There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.
A sign posted in Germany's Black forest:
It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.
In a Zurich hotel:
Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist:
Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.
In a Rome laundry:
Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.
Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand:
Would you like to ride on your own ass?
In a Swiss mountain inn:
Special today -- no ice cream.
In a Bangkok temple:
It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.
In a Tokyo bar:
Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.
In a Copenhagen airline ticket office:
We take your bags and send them in all directions.
On the door of a Moscow hotel room:
If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge:
Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
In a Budapest zoo:
Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
In the office of a Roman doctor:
Specialist in women and other diseases.
In an Acapulco hotel:
The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
In a Tokyo shop:
Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.
From a Japanese information booklet about
using a hotel air conditioner:
Cools and Heats: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself.
From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo:
When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.

My vote for the lamest April Fool's Joke of 2010:

Thursday News Story Test 0401-009