I have 3 monitors  an Alienware 34 inch  widescreen (main display ) , and 2X dell 22 inch that display vertically , all worked fine , I wanted the 3080 for HDMI 2.1 so I could use my LG Oled for gaming (only used for gaming) , I can connect the Oled and all seems to work fine as long as the tv is on regardless of being used for gaming or watching tv , but if connected and turned off , then it messes with the other 3 monitors the main display becomes one of the 22 inch monitors and the other 2 seem to have no signal just black screens then , I would like to leave the tv connected to the HDMI but it seems if the Port on the gpu is not able to see the TV and the monitors go to sleep,when awoken now my desktop is is on one of the 22 inch monitors which is in portrait mode so it is sideways , now if I turn the TV on everything goes back to normal, so the issues seems to be that when the monitors go to sleep the gpu forgets how everything was before hand until I turn the tv back on , I have a Mis z390 godlike , I9-9900k , 64g corsair dominator ram , not sure how to fix this or if it is even possible, have played around in Nvidia control panel , and windows 11 display setting , any help would be appreciate. Thanks in advance.

"Windows 11 display setting"

Well there's your problem!
--
Adam Savage

Let's just say that Win11 has a long, LONG wait until it qualifies as "half baked".

On top of that, the way nVidia and ATI handle multi-monitor is...SPECIAL (and not in a good way).

Just be glad you're not ALSO trying to use NVSURROUND to merge your monitors into a seam-free, contiguous desktop.
I am, because I need it that way.  And I needed to use Start11 to make the taskbar "kinda" work.

The main issue is that you're trying to use the TV as part of your everyday desktop.
But Windows expects the "monitor" to ALWAYS be there.
So when the onboard power management  subtracts the monitor from the mix, the Windows interface goes nuts trying to accommodate it.
And adding it back in causes further freak-out.

This behavior would also be present on a Win10 machine too.

AHowes
I believe the main issue is the gpu always wants to use the hdmi connected monitor as the main screen. I believe it's built into the firmware and donthing one can do about it. The post boot screen will always show up now on the hdmi as well if connected.

Maybe a fix could be to try a display port to hdmi adapter? Do they even make a hdmi 2.1 adapter?

That I do not know , the adapter would have to be 2.1 for sure,I will look around to see if i can find something

Give this a try, shutdown the PC and disconnect all outputs. 
Connect the 34" to the top DP output (rightmost) and power on the PC, bring up Nvidia Control Panel >Display>Set up multiple display and observe.
Connect the second monitor under the top DP and then third monitor under monitor 2 the display configuration should show display (1) 34" (2) 22" (3) 22" and finally connect the TV to the HDMI port the TV should shows as display 4.
Now turn off the TV and all 3 monitors should remain unchanged.