Ok i don't think i am clocking to high.  i am staying with in what i think are base values.  maybe i am not overclocking at all but. 
I have the EVGA GTX 260 Superclocked 896mb, Card
 
Its listed to be running at
Core clock of 626
Memory clock of 2106.
 
I set the settings in EVGA Precision 2.0 to
626 core
1350 shader
1300 memory
seemed to run fine. The only game i play at the moment is EQ2 and it ran fine.  maxxed settings it used about 35-40% of the card. 
At random times it the screen will flash and my settings move to
400
800
300
 
I need to reboot to get the settings back.  it dies this even if i hit the reset button and my clocks go down a few points each. 
 
This is getting old.  The card is not running hot.  between 45-60c  fan stays around 40-60%. 
 
What can i do to fix this?  is it a problem with my installation of Precision?  i just had to reboot my comp last week with a new hard drive.  am i missing a setting? 
 
The card is listed on every site i have looked at to run at 2106 memory clock.  but i can't even get precision to go that high.
 
  Edit,  i am running on driver 260.89

For memory(ddr2/3 wise) you multiply it by 2 for the effective rate. So what johnerz said is right. 
 
What you set in precision multiply it by 2 and there how 'fast' its actually running.
 
For ddr5 you multiply it by 4 cause its does 4 bit every pass