Nereus
 
Can't answer you about leases - whenever possible, I prefer to buy things outright, and I don't like the idea of being beholden to drive a limited amount of miles on something I sort of own but maybe I don't. I also think buying recertified cars is a better option, since brand new cars drop a large percentage of their value the moment you drive them off the lot, whereas recertified still has a similar warranty but with a cheaper price.
 
I mainly commented to say I like the term "snarkasm".