1.
http://www.evga.com/thermalmod/ Scroll to the very bottom to see what the status of your request is. Make sure that you are logged in.
2. No one knows how long it will take as EVGA hasn't announced a timeline and it is unlikely that they will. The thermal pads AND VBIOS update are both optional, as even without them the cards runs within specifications (even though it runs hotter than the competition).
3. No, Nvidia cards do not have any temperature sensors for the VRAM or the VRMs so no software can monitor them. You could get an AIO cooler and a bracket to hold it to the card (Kraken X41 and Kraken G10 is what I use on my 1080 ACX 3.0 card) and then you can use a wireless IR gun to measure the temperatures directly - for my card, looping Valley at 2202/5557MHz the top of the VRMs run 40C, the back of the VRMs run 60C and the VRAM runs much cooler, however a FTW with more VRM phases is expected to run warmer.
4. For the FTW VRM (not VRAM) temps, it was reported to drop temperatures significantly for the FTW models. The backplate temps are shown in the link provided in #1 (backplate temps will always be hotter than the actual VRM fronts due to airflow from the heatsink fan).